The Adventure of a Lifetime

Here are a few photos from Pastor John Mark's first Sunday with us!

And, in case you missed it, here's Pastor John Mark's first sermon, "The Adventure of a Lifetime."

7-15-12 (The Adventure of a Lifetime) from Apex Baptist Church on Vimeo.

Ministering to the Minister's Children

Amy Carroll

Your dad’s up front every Sunday instead of in the pew with his strong arm around you. You feel the weight of the church’s expectations, but you’re just a kid. It sometimes seems like you have to share your parents with a whole steeple-topped building of people. If you’ve ever experienced any of these things, you might have been a preacher’s kid—affectionately known as a PK.

So often we focus on the people up front—the pastors, the praise team, the choir, etc—and those small people back in the nurseries and Sunday school halls get over-looked. Facts and Trends didn’t forget them! In addition to the tips for blessing your pastor and pastor’s wife, they’ve included a list on how to bless your pastors’ children. Pray with me about how you can implement some of these personally as you interact with Cade and our other pastors’ kids.

Ministering to the Minister’s Kids: 

1. Allow your minister to put his family first. Nurturing and building relationships with family takes effort, energy and time. Your minister needs to know that he has permission to be the husband and parent God has called him to be. Allow him to set the standard for the rest of your church. 
2. Treat their dad with love and respect. Most kids think their dad is the greatest! Their relationship with their dad is often the basis for their relationship with their heavenly Father. It's amazing how many ministers' kids become disillusioned with God because of the way the church treated their dad. 
3. Allow your minister's kids to be human. The minister's kids are just like any other kids. They have good days and bad days. They enjoy some things more than others. They want to be treated like the rest of the group. 
4. Offer a helping hand. Have you ever noticed that when your minister is at church he's pretty busy? Have you noticed that during worship your minister's kids might need some extra love? Offer to sit with your minister's family when he's not available. 
5. Offer to be adopted grandparents. Every kid needs to be spoiled rotten by their grandparents, yet many of our ministers' kids live a long way from their extended family and don't get that opportunity. Consider adopting your minister's kids a couple times a year for some VIP treatment. 
6. Give gifts that include your minister's kids. Ministers often receive gifts of appreciation during the year. Consider giving a family-inclusive gift like theme park passes, a zoo membership, gift cards to a local movie theater or tickets to special events in your community. 
7. Recognize the kids' sacrifice to the church. On special occasions, celebrations, milestones and anniversaries, acknowledge the entire family's service and sacrifice. Kids often share their dad during evenings and weekends because of church ministries and needs. Recognize and appreciate their part in their dad's ministry. 
8. Talk with the kids about themselves. Speak to the kids, not just the minister. Resist the urge to always bring up their dad and church stuff. Take the time to discover their interests and have conversations with them about them. Find ways to make them feel special. 
9. Take your minister and his family to lunch. The next time you take your minister and his family for a meal, ask his kids to pick the restaurant. 
10. Make your minister's kids feel valued. Look for opportunities to encourage, congratulate and dote over your minister's kids. Celebrate good grades, recitals, sports games and school achievements. 

Bill Emeott is LifeWay's kids ministry specialist. 
This article is re-printed with permission from Facts and Trends 2012 Summer Edition.

Ministering to the Minister's Wife

Amy Carroll

When you think of the words “minister’s wife”, what comes to mind? I’ve found that the fact that I have a stereotype in mind is probably the main problem for my poor ministers’ wives! The truth is that this difficult position is held by women of every type and description. They aren’t just the role that they fill. They’re real live women created by God as uniquely as each and every snowflake.

I’ve had the privilege to be friends with several pastors’ wives, and I hold a special place in my heart for these godly women. I was thrilled that Facts and Trends included not only a list of ways to reach out to pastors but also a list of suggestions for their wives. I’m getting excited just thinking about which one I’d like to do for Brigitte! I hope you’ll join me in blessing all our pastors’ wives.

Ministering to the Minister’s Wife:

1. Support her ministry passion. Do not assume your minister's wife WANTS to be a leader or member of your leadership team. Find out what her passion is for ministry and support her in it.
2. Ask how you can pray for her and her family. For a large staff, each month pray for a different minister and spouse. Find out specific requests and send a note of encouragement during that month. 
3. Remember special dates. Send birthday and anniversary cards to your ministers and their family members. 
4. Let her be known as an individual. Ask your minister's wife if she would be willing to share her story with your women at an event or small group. Let her know you want to get to know her personally, and you want the women in your church to know her, too. 
5. During staff appreciation times, do something special for the wives. Provide them with a "pamper time" that could include manicures, pedicures, massages or facials. 
6. Do not complain to her about her husband! If you have an issue to discuss, go directly to the minister you need to talk to. 
7. Give her a night off. If she has young children, offer to take the kids so that she and her husband can have a night alone. Or, offer to keep them overnight so they can go out of town for a night or two. 
8. Let her serve. If she loves to teach, ask if she would lead your next Bible study for a short period of time. If she's not a teacher, ask her to be a part of the study as a member. 
9. Buy her a great book. Give her a copy of In Our Shoes: Real Life Issues for Ministers' Wives. This is a ministers' wives Bible study written by real life ministers' wives Jennifer Landrith and Rachel Lovingood. If you have more than one staff wife, give each one a copy so they can do the study together. 
10. Cut her some slack. Remember, she is just like you . . . a busy woman who has a heart for God and is seeking how to grow and serve Him. She struggles with some of the same issues you do, but hers may be much more visible! 

Chris Adams (chris.adams@lifeway.com) is the senior lead women's ministry specialist at LifeWay. This article is reprinted with permission from Facts and Trends 2012 Summer Edition.

Ministering to the Minister

Amy Carroll

It’s hard to believe that after over a year of waiting, our new pastor is coming in just a couple of weeks! Just like any relationship transition, there are bound to be phases. The first phase will be a honeymoon phase that’s a virtual love-fest where nobody can do anything wrong. But honeymoons don’t last forever, and that’s when we’ll enter into a phase where real love and commitment will need to be our hallmarks.

So many times I’ve looked at my pastor and his family as super-human spiritual giants, and I’ve assessed them according to what they can give to me. The truth, though, is that our pastors and their families are people just like us. They’re people with feelings and the need for encouragement just like you and me. I know that John Mark, Brigitte and Cade have lots to give, but this time around, I want to look for ways to give back to them.

I’m excited about the transition, and I can’t wait for you to get to know and love the whole Harrison family as much as our Pastor Search Committee already does. As I was thinking about ways to make them feel welcomed and loved, I ran across an excellent article in Lifeway’s Facts and Trends magazine that I’d like to share with you. I hope you’ll join me in adopting some of these suggestions!

Ways to Minister to the Minister:

1. Pray. Specifically pray for him and his family. Pray for wisdom, courage, protection, patience, brokenness, godliness, leadership, and passion. 
2. Be an encourager. A written note can be kept and reread on those lonely and confusing days when the "call to ministry" seems to be the only thing he has to hold on to. 
3. Remember him throughout the year. Send birthday, anniversary and special occasion wishes. In addition, when a minister actually sees his spouse and family being genuinely cared for by others, it calms his spirit. "Genuinely" is the operative word. 
4. Be his prayer warrior. Those serendipitous emails from prayer warriors are often written prayers laced with Scripture, authentic love and appreciation. An inbox filled with these types of emails can be treasured and timely. 
5. Speak positively and genuinely about him in public as well as in private. Be accountable to speak more often and more highly of your minister. 
6. Give a gift card. Who doesn't love to eat! Give him a card of appreciation and include a gift card to go out to eat somewhere nice. This can make for a date night as well. 
7. Tell him to go away. Ministers need time away to be refreshed and renewed. A Sunday school class or small group could give him (either by himself or with his wife or family) an opportunity to get away for a day or two to pray, retool or rest. A minister gets tired and needs a break. You can't imagine the pressure. 
8. Support him by serving. There are countless ways to support your minister by just serving in your church. It's frustrating that most church members serve inconsistently, if at all. Don't just volunteer, but be a recruiter of volunteers. 
9. Speak the truth in love. This does not give anyone the right to be rude. A minister will be more appreciative and open when he knows the speaker is motivated by godliness. 
10. Be a disciple. The best thing you can do to support your minister is to be a part of the plan and process of becoming a disciple who thinks and acts like Christ. This makes you part of the solution in fulfilling the Great Commission. 

The author, Gary Jennings, is a consultant in LifeWay's church partnerships area. 
This article is reprinted with permission from Facts and Trends 2012 Summer Edition.