Your dad’s up front every Sunday instead of in the pew with his strong arm around you. You feel the weight of the church’s expectations, but you’re just a kid. It sometimes seems like you have to share your parents with a whole steeple-topped building of people. If you’ve ever experienced any of these things, you might have been a preacher’s kid—affectionately known as a PK.
So often we focus on the people up front—the pastors, the praise team, the choir, etc—and those small people back in the nurseries and Sunday school halls get over-looked. Facts and Trends didn’t forget them! In addition to the tips for blessing your pastor and pastor’s wife, they’ve included a list on how to bless your pastors’ children. Pray with me about how you can implement some of these personally as you interact with Cade and our other pastors’ kids.
Ministering to the Minister’s Kids:
- Allow your minister to put his family first. Nurturing and building relationships with family takes effort, energy and time. Your minister needs to know that he has permission to be the husband and parent God has called him to be. Allow him to set the standard for the rest of your church.
- Treat their dad with love and respect. Most kids think their dad is the greatest! Their relationship with their dad is often the basis for their relationship with their heavenly Father. It's amazing how many ministers' kids become disillusioned with God because of the way the church treated their dad.
- Allow your minister's kids to be human. The minister's kids are just like any other kids. They have good days and bad days. They enjoy some things more than others. They want to be treated like the rest of the group.
- Offer a helping hand. Have you ever noticed that when your minister is at church he's pretty busy? Have you noticed that during worship your minister's kids might need some extra love? Offer to sit with your minister's family when he's not available.
- Offer to be adopted grandparents. Every kid needs to be spoiled rotten by their grandparents, yet many of our ministers' kids live a long way from their extended family and don't get that opportunity. Consider adopting your minister's kids a couple times a year for some VIP treatment.
- Give gifts that include your minister's kids. Ministers often receive gifts of appreciation during the year. Consider giving a family-inclusive gift like theme park passes, a zoo membership, gift cards to a local movie theater or tickets to special events in your community.
- Recognize the kids' sacrifice to the church. On special occasions, celebrations, milestones and anniversaries, acknowledge the entire family's service and sacrifice. Kids often share their dad during evenings and weekends because of church ministries and needs. Recognize and appreciate their part in their dad's ministry.
- Talk with the kids about themselves. Speak to the kids, not just the minister. Resist the urge to always bring up their dad and church stuff. Take the time to discover their interests and have conversations with them about them. Find ways to make them feel special.
- Take your minister and his family to lunch. The next time you take your minister and his family for a meal, ask his kids to pick the restaurant.
- Make your minister's kids feel valued. Look for opportunities to encourage, congratulate and dote over your minister's kids. Celebrate good grades, recitals, sports games and school achievements.
This article is re-printed with permission from Facts and Trends 2012 Summer Edition.
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